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Limp Bizkit Guitarist Not Stoked for ‘Roided-Out Bohunks’ on Upcoming Cruise


Batten down the hatches and break out the red New York Yankees fitted, Limp Bizkit is hitting the high seas next week as headliners of of the ShipRocked cruise and guitarist Wes Borland couldn’t be more morose.

As Metal Injection points out, Borland took to Instagram to express his discontent, posting a photo of his luggage and caption that contained such charming sentiments as: “Can’t wait to see me some roided out tribal tattooed spray tanned Jell-O shot filled bohunks do their best drunk MMA impressions in the top deck mosh pit.”

Swinging between disgruntled fatalism and straight-up snark, Borland bemoaned the prospect of spending his time not onstage, holed up “fetal position in my cabin, palms up, while I desperately cling to the last week of my thirties as it slips through my hooked fingers.” But amidst the existential terror of aging, the guitarist never gave up looking for that silver lining.

“So, I’d like to give a shout out now to all the other over-the-hill late Nineties/early 2000s bands going on the cruise: Let’s give these people the raging alcohol-fueled nostalgia fest they’re paying for, guys!” Borland wrote. “I know we can do it if we tune down low enough!”

Borland has had a tumultuous tenure in Limp Bizkit, quitting and re-joining the band on multiple occasions, most notably in 2001 following the success of 2000′s Chocolate Starfish and the Hot Dog Flavored Water. After a rocky few years and ensuing hiatus during the mid-2000s, Limp Bizkit reunited in 2009 and released Gold Cobra in 2011. The band has been working on the follow-up, Stampede of the Disco Elephant, though a release date has yet to be set.

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